It's not easy being green.

So I realize that most people would find this crazy. But the leaves arent even all on the ground yet dancing with the wind, and my mind is wrapped about Christmas and the shopping that is involved with it. I dont want to be that person last minute in the store. I'd rather be outside enjoying the sunshine, or snow, or christmas lights, or whatever else it is that i miss during the season because I am shopping or making or whatever.

So yesterday started it. I got my little unborn nephew... DONE. and Meg, Nikki, Bp and my mother started. I think I am on a very good start.

changing

the world around us is changing at a steady pace. there is a slight chill in the wind as it hits my face. leaves are already starting to see their wintery fate. crinkling on the ground. summery days have come and passed. cardigans, hoodies and sweaters come out from hibernation. i've missed you so. few short hours my (real) last first day will be completed. a long 15 weeks up ahead. pushing through to get to the finish line and be handed that one single piece of paper we all desire. Always aware of the world around me. what comes in and what goes out. what stays awhile and what is only here for vacation. some vacations are longer than others. to quote nikki, i thought it was a "lifer". i'm on what seems to be my everlasting quest for love. i'm bored with the ones that only use me as a stepping stone to get to one of my friends. i will not be used in such a way. The ones made my heart pitter patter never really seemed to be worth it in the end. Although there is one male that I think I should be giving a chance to... i just wish i knew a way to contact him...

reflections on the past 3 months...
i worked more than one little peanut in the world of big peanuts should ever work.
i enjoyed the celebration of love
i got teary eyed at the celebration of a life (rip nikki's papa)
i picnic-ed in orient point
i beat the evil monster known as statistics
i made a friend or two


predictions of the next three months...
classes til my heart cant bear it. papers. tests.
working 20 hours a week. (i can handle that)
the desire to make friends. I want one in each class.
meet boys. a natural way.
wedding photographer.
baby shower.
becoming an aunt! <3
holidays
friends/family (cuz i have them both now!)
my best and her best. must spend more time with and around them.
movies. need to watch more. culture myself.
go to yoga with meg.
keep my room clean for an entire semester.

sometimes....

Sometimes all you need is a nice boy from work to walk you to your car late at night after work to make you smile.

i never want to be like you....

How are you supposed to respect and actually love someone when you really cant stand them? It's a little odd to me. I do love and respect him. But I dont even like him.

When I have kids i will:
always be there for them.
not have a short temper.
give them the answer i really want to give them the first time around.
keep my word.
not be the "no parent"
help them when they have a problem.
not make them feel like crap when something went wrong.
guide them.
make them think that when things go wrong that it is their fault unless it actually is.

all in all... i know i have your genes and there are a lot of common ground between us.. but i dont want to be like you. Any part of you. ever.

wedding.

The only man I ever need....

this is my little Gizmo... isn't he lovely?